Gotta appreciate the good times. Life throws curve balls, and not everything is easy to deal with, despite it being of our own making. One thing I’ve been learning from all this, is how important all the meaningful connections we make with each other. It’s what kept me going through the hard times. When you surround yourself with good people, they keep you afloat. They keep you going in the right direction. They give you hope.
Don’t be a dick
I’ve been under enormous stress (of my own doing of course), but despite all that, I’m able to overcome it each day by connecting with people. Sometimes it’s by seeing good friends that I’ve known for years and have grown to love… Sometimes it’s by meeting new people in new ways, (almost every single day/night). It’s amazing how much you have in common with people that subscribe to the simple rule of “Don’t be a dick”. That’s literally all it takes. But it’s so important.
Some people just don’t have the compassion or empathy to care about what other people feel about what they do or who they are. Which is a shame because they’re just ignoring themselves. When someone points something out in us.. It’s us pointing it out to us. We are all of the same life…
Mornings suck sometimes
There’s many mornings that I’m not exactly cheerful lately. I get downright emotional sometimes right when I wake up. And if I sit in it without making any changes, I end up going in a downward spiral and don’t want to leave my bed. But what makes it all better is other people.
It can be my daughters, of whom it seems we’ve become a little estranged, but their presence gives me the energy I need to keep going. They’re upset about moving etc, but they understand we need to do it.
Haley is really worried about her cat though, which also makes me very anxious. This cat is her soul mate. They were put here together at this time, on this planet, in this arrangement, for a reason. They heal each other by just being with each other. And she’s worried that if we move out into the desert or mountains or where ever, that her cat will get eaten or lost or hurt or whatever, and for good reason. In our current community/location, the cat seems to know its territory pretty well and we have a good system for having him locked inside at night (when little animals are most vulnerable). But she’s worried that before we learn a new system for dealing the new location and various predators, that we’d lose the cat.
Plus it’s scary to move, and it sucks to change schools when you’re a kid. But as long our intentions are positive and healthy and for the betterment of our family, I have faith that we will be okay.
Meeting new people
It’s my favorite thing that happens when you get out of your comfort zone. And when I see someone else getting out of their comfort zone (and you can tell when it’s happening), it makes me appreciate the effort that much more. Because I know how embarrassing it can be, how vulnerable it makes you feel, and how much courage it takes to put yourself out there, regardless of the motive.
I started going to some places that play live music 6 days a week, etc… and it’s super fun and I end up dancing all night, having a great time. There’s an older woman (a recent widow of a very long marriage, like 60 yrs or something) that is there every single night, dancing the entire time. Not drinking any alcohol, and not taking any drugs that I know of. She is literally just out there having a great time, and it doesn’t matter whether she’s the only one dancing on the floor or not. She’s out there for hours. So when I saw that courage, I borrowed some and started dancing with her and everyone else and it’s really become a fun part of my routine.
I left my debit card one night, and forced me to come back the next night to get it back, and my friend that loves playing pool, saw there was some pool tables there and had a great time, and I got to dance with Vicky, my dear old friend I mentioned before, that I met in Cardiff. Amazing and unique people I meet every single time I go out and I love every single one of them. But it felt like the universe trying to make sure I realize the effect it’s having on my life.
Dancing/Yoga/Physical Exercise/Emotional Exercise/Spiritual Exercise
I’ve come to understand how important it is to move around.. Whether that’s in your head, or in your soul, or in your body.
Do you know what it’s like to touch a person, and get that electric feeling… Like two nodes just connected by law of attraction and it becomes almost explosive in the mind and heart. It doesn’t have to be a sexual charge. It can just be of love, or compassion.
Well, I get that same level of elation, and hope, and love when I dance, or do yoga, or skate, or work through some trauma, or have some spiritual breakthrough. I think it’s when we have a large amount of data that we don’t know what to do with (because we evolved to only contain 5 senses), and it kind of like overloading of our input stream. Getting either data we’ve never been made to understand, or it’s just too much data.
Meeting old friends
This is another amazing experience I try to replicate daily. It’s those familiar acquaintances that just bring elation. You know that feeling when you’ve experienced something so extraordinarily profound, and you are exploding to tell your best friend and describe down to every single detail you can fathom? So they can share your experience with you? Live vicariously through you?
This is not what it feels like every time I see a person I made a connection to. But when the moment is right, and when you’re in that flow, sometimes the right group of people, having the right amount of a good time and conversation, can literally make life so fulfilling. When I look in the faces of some of my friends I truly have made a life-long connection to and there’s been many of those in my years…. And I can feel their love… It makes the long days worth every sacrifice. I can see their pain sometimes, but I know my joy makes it okay for them. And when I’m in pain, their joy gives me the power right back.
It’s like feeling the sun’s warmth and energy. It’s the most healing thing i’ve ever experienced. The love from other people, and the love of the planet and sun.
When I have friends over in my backyard, sitting by my fire pit, enjoying some cannabis, laughing, or eating shrooms, or sometimes just enjoying each others company over a cup of coffee, or cacao… These are good times. The times I appreciate. It fills my soul with happiness that people left my home thinking “Man, what a good time I just had with my friends”. That makes me full of joy.
We need to get back to this. I need to share this appreciation of other people with my daughters in a healthy, respective manner. I would love some tradition or ritual or “container” to help me move forward with this. Specifically when it comes to my family. My daughters mean everything to me.